This is the first scene of my adaptation of G.K. Chesterton’s “The Man Who Was Thursday.” I hope you enjoy.
Bills, bills, and nothing but bills. Anyone who expects a writer like me to obtain this kind of money is completely off his onion. I’m hardly making ends meet as it is and they expect me to pay twice the amount? Oof!
Oh, and look at this, they want me to invest in another subscription. Ha! No thank you. Quoodle would just rip it up and use it as his personal fire hydrant; once again, no thank you. We have enough useless paper littering the house as it is.
... Wait a moment. A letter from old Edmund Bentley? Well this is a treat; there’s actually something worthwhile in the mail! What’s he writing for I wonder?
(CHESTERTON grabs a letter opener and opens the letter. He reacts as he reads)
Dear Mr. Chesterton, it has been a while hasn’t it? How is your wife treating you? Well, I hope. I just wanted to congratulate you on your latest book Heretics. I couldn’t agree with you more about our modern culture and its ever present pessimists. So many men nowadays are trying to rebel against orthodoxy as if the liturgy were the source of every wrong in the church. I know that, and you certainly know it, but I feel as though the rebels confound it. So I say, give them something to be confounded about; something so startling that they will listen to it without prejudice. How can I say what I mean. I suppose what I am suggesting is a parable, a modern day parable; a story to be mulled over one’s crumpets and tea. A story that will settle into the minds of the pessimists and reconvert them to optimism. I hope you would oblige me with my request, oh prince of paradox. Sincerely yours, Edmund Clerihew Bentley.
(He puts down the letter)
A modern parable? ... Seems a trifle eccentric. But perhaps....
(CHESTERTON grabs his Bible. Mumbles)
Now there was a day when the sons of God came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan came also among them. ... Hast thou considered my servant Job.
(CHESTERTON closes the Bible and ponders. After a beat, he puts the Bible down and repositions his chair. He puts a page in the typewriter)
A modern parable...